I was working on another post throughout today but I am saving it for later. I am not done with it and I seriously think this one is more important.

I just caught myself stress eating! WTH! I have NEVER been a stress eater. I was the exact opposite. I used to lose my appetite when I was super stressed.

Jackson is taking his first nap since 9am! He only napped for 40 minutes then. He has been battling me all day. I finally gave in and put him in the swing. I just couldn’t take it anymore. Against my better judgement I am probably backtracking all the work I have done getting him to nap in his room. Although today was more like day 1 not nearly two weeks! Wednesday is two weeks since I started trying this….ugh

Anyway. I found myself eating to relax myself after I put him in his swing and he quieted down. I am blogging about this embarrassing fact because I want to nip it in the bud right this second. Unacceptable. First, I will never lose these last few pounds if I continue this atrocious behavior. Second, I will likely GAIN back all the weight I lost. All of my hard work and dedication would be for naught! I will say at least my choices were not too bad. I had one small frozen dark chocolate covered banana. The tiny diana’s bananas one. And some Pirate’s Booty, aged white cheddar rice puffs. So it is not like I scarfed down something from Man vs Food or anything. But still that is incredibly unhealthy behavior. I need to replace that with some relaxing yoga poses or a light workout or something. I already did a 30 minute pilates workout this morning. I am considering doing another short workout right now. Jackson is napping in his swing…..I mean I am supposed to cook dinner and eat in an hour, but I just stuffed my face! How ridiculous.

So here is me being accountable. I absolutely cannot fall into this trap. I am baffled as to why it is happening. I am guessing it is hormonal. And perhaps because I am breastfeeding. So losing my appetite is sort of physically out of the question, since I need food to fuel my body to produce milk for the baby. Whatever the HECK this is I want to it go away. What a dangerous road. I never understood this concept until now. I certainly hope that along with all the other hormonal ridiculousness that comes with breastfeeding, that this goes away.

I have seriously never been more disgusted with myself. WHO AM I???? Eating to feel better. Gosh…..I think I need to go workout to make myself feel better! UGH Shame on you Nicole! SHAME!