We had Jack’s gymnastics play class today. Finally back to classes after our winter break of sorts. The holidays all fell on Tuesdays, which is our class day. Mix in a cold or two before that, and we haven’t been in a while. During independent time the mom’s/caregivers were chatting with the head teacher. He is amazing. Even my husband mentioned how good he is when we went there for a New Year’s Eve party. He doesn’t throw out compliments willy nilly. He has to really believe it to say it.

One of the mom’s has a newborn baby. So we were all cooing over him. Then got to talking about dressing boys which led to talking about hand me downs. That led to this little tidbit he explained to us. He said that a lot of the moms in the area wouldn’t accept hand me downs for their kids. He has encountered it a lot. To each their own. I don’t mind hand me downs. I don’t mind giving away Jack’s things he no longer uses or fits in. We have gotten a few hand me downs of things. Particularly, Jack’s car table. He LOVES it. He is playing with it as I type this. If we get things, we go through them, keep what we like and set aside what we don’t. No big deal. That isn’t what deeply bothered me though.

He then explained that he has been witness to many mom’s doing something pretty awful at birthday parties. While the kids are playing, the mom goes in the party room to unwrap all of the child’s gifts. She pulls out what she deems “worthy” of her child. She will rewrap it and give it to the child. She puts aside toys that are “too cheap” for her child.WillyWonka_veruca He has over heard them saying “this couldn’t have cost more than 5 or 10 dollars, this is garbage, etc” I was and am shocked! It actually makes me very sad, that people are like that. That they are raising their child like that!

We are comfortable financially. Jack doesn’t really want for anything. These facts do not mean that I am an awful brat, though. They do not mean that I will allow Jack to be an awful spoiled brat. I am thankful for everything we have. I am thankful for every gift he receives from other people. No matter the cost. I think he is lucky to be so loved that people want to give him gifts. I wasn’t raised with a ton of money. I was raised to appreciate what we were given. Especially gifts. We were always told to smile and say thank you, no matter what the gift was. My mother certainly never would have unwrapped our gifts before we could, to approve if they were expensive enough! I would never ever consider doing this for my son. I never knew people did something like that until today. The thought had never even crossed my mind.

I just don’t think that is right at all. That is so wrong and spoiled. It is an awful example to set for children. I never want my child to behave that way. He will be raised like I was, to appreciate what he is given. To say thank you. He already says “please” “thank” and “welc”  It just really bothers me that things like this happen. I know I cannot control others. But I just cannot understand what would possess someone to behave that way. Someone went to the store and was thoughtful enough to buy your child something. They were thoughtful enough to drive to a party and spend a few hours celebrating your child. THAT should be enough. The world would be a better place if it were.

If we want Jack to have a big ticket item, guess who we expect to purchase that for him? Ourselves. We would never expect others in our lives to buy him pricey things. That is for us, as his parents, to worry about and to budget for. I actually had a conversation about this with my aunt before the holidays. There is a kid’s grab bag in our family. We recently dropped the price amount for it. My aunt and I were talking about how we thought it had been way too high before. Especially since most people involved have more than one child in it. If we wanted something that expensive for our kids, we thought we should be the ones to worry about it. Not other family members. We were in agreement about the outlook Jason and I have adopted.

Like I said, we cannot control others. All I can do with this information is remind myself of what I never want to be as a parent. Of how I never want my child to act or think it is acceptable to act that way. I am going to use this as a parenting lesson. I have learned so much from it already. I know what I am dealing with in the area we live. I know what might happen at parties my child attends. I know I never want to be that cautionary tale I heard today. I know I want my family to always always always be thankful for the life we have been afforded. To never take our blessings for granted. I know I have to be the one to instill that sentiment in my child.

Have you come across any crazy spoiled parenting situations like I did today? Or anything else for that matter that just really blew your mind?