Yesterday marked a big milestone in my Pilates teacher journey. I officially finished the training courses! We are all done with classroom time. I have to complete my million hours of practice teaching now. Yikes! I cannot believe we have reached this point. It feels like September was only yesterday. pilates

I have a myriad of emotions about this all. They range from excited, to terrified, to frustrated. I am not sure I can explain entirely why I am all over the place. This is an off week for me in general. That has to be a contributing factor. I am excited for obvious reasons. I did it! I finished a huge part of this. The next is to apply my knowledge. Terrified because I have to apply that knowledge. And frustration is likely over the same thing. Working out how to articulate what I know. Getting to know the clients and their needs. Many of these clients have been there for years. When I enter a class to teach I feel blind, since I don’t know them like their regular instructors do.

I am excited to get my own clients. I would like to start to build a relationship with people and train them. I want to share the love of Pilates with everyone. I want to help make someone’s life better. I want to help them move and feel better every single day. I am frustrated because sometimes I feel like I am not seeing what my Master Teacher sees. I know that is why SHE is a master teacher and I am still a novice. But I have said this before and I will say this again, I am incredibly hard on myself. I get so mad at myself when I can’t see or do what I am trying to see or do. I know that it will come with time and experience. But my inner voice sometimes won’t listen to that rationalization. There are many times where I DO see what she is speaking of.  You see, the thing is, Pilates is in millimeters. The correctness of the moves are often incredibly tiny movements. Your eye really has to develop to see that. There are many times I do see it. But I hate it when I look and I am just baffled. I have to tell myself to ease up and just keep looking and practicing. I know how these feel in my own body. I know what I am looking for in general. I am always self correcting my positions. I know where a client is supposed to be most of the time. Especially in the moves I am very familiar with.

A portion of my journey is over. I am entering the next phase of my journey. This journey will never really end. I believe I will always be learning and improving myself as a Pilates teacher. Who knows what the future holds down the road. The possibilities are unlimited!